Trump is Coming

I live in a mostly rural state that is largely ignored during presidential election season. Around here, we joke about being outnumbered by the livestock. I didn't realize how much I enjoyed electoral neglect until this season when Trump announced he'd be paying us a visit.

If you can't tell, he's yelling FUCK! Just like I want to.

I am dumbfounded how this blowhard actually made it this far. Like many others, I never really took him seriously until it was too late. There were so many Republican douche nozzles to choose from, it seemed ridiculous to believe that this particular one would end up last douche nozzle standing.

It's a mystery. 

A mere year ago, a friend and I would joke about Trump. We'd laugh and comment about what an asshat he was. We even dropped silly memes on each other's Facebook page with the tag line, "You've been Trumped!" It all seemed to ludicrous to even entertain the idea that he could somehow actually garner enough support to be taken seriously. Yet, here we are.

A Trump pun? Glorious! Except it is becoming all too real a possibility.

Can I just shout a big, "What the fuck" of frustration? How did we get here? Why are any members of the GOP giving him support? I am not a Bush I nor Bush II fan mind you, but I applaud their collective refusal to endorse Trump the Dumbass. All Republicans should renounce him and his fuckery. The Republicans have to have some archaic rule or motion up their sleeves so that they can nominate someone from the floor of the convention. Please. Someone tell me there's a weird loophole somewhere to save us all from confirming him as a valid candidate for president. I am a liberal hippie tree hugging progressive, so there's no way I'd ever vote for one of the elephants, but I also don't want to continue witnessing their surreal demise at the hands of a loudmouthed ignoramus who does nothing but embarrass their party and make America anything but great.

Not even trying anymore. 

I really hope there are people in the world who realize not all Americans believe in Trump or his misguided, inflammatory bigotry. I am ashamed to see this dickwad being taken seriously and given a microphone to the world. I don't want him to try and rally support from the people in my state. I want the people of my state to reject him and his hatred and his cult of personality that celebrates ignorance. Alas! There's little I can do. Or is there...

 The answer was in my newsfeed.

However, I did find a little subversive activity this morning. I reserved two tickets to the rally with absolutely no intention of attending. I wish you could reserve more, but two per mobile number is all that is allowed. I went to Trump's page, went to the schedule tab, and selected the Billings rally. I submitted my information and made sure to uncheck the box asking to receive his newsletter. There are now two seats that will remain empty at that rally because of this. I posted to Facebook about it and got some of my fellow Montanans to participate in my slacktivism. This is how we are choosing to protest his presence in our state: passive aggressive activism baby! My husband has a mobile number, too, so with his permission I am going to reserve another two tickets that will remain empty. I really just want to shout this out to everyone I possibly can: Please, reserve seats at his rally and then don't show up. I want that fucktard with a bad combover to look out from his podium and see a vast sea of empty chairs. I want him to know that he doesn't speak for America because America is greater without him and his brash intolerance of humanity's highest self. I may have been laughing a year ago, but I'm not laughing now. Trump is coming. I can't stop it. I will however reserve tickets that will remain at the ticket booth as protest of his dickory. To Trump and anyone who supports him, I say: