Myth

You know, there's a lot about Greek mythology that is messed up. Seriously. What's up with Zeus and his philandering and his bestiality? Then, they explain the passage of the seasons with a kidnapping and roofie tale like Persephone and Hades. Sheesh. That's some messed up shit. Then there's Pandora. While she was considered a "punishment" after Prometheus stole fire and gave it to the humans, there is something about that myth that I do appreciate: hope.

You see, Pandora unleashed the sins of the world upon the humans when she opened that box, although it was apparently a jar, not a box. Anyway, this myth is supposed to explain why there is evil in the world. But at the bottom of that jar, one thing was left and that was hope.

The myth itself isn't terribly inspiring or anything. In fact it is misogynistic that again a female is to blame for the badness in the world, but it does remind us to keep hope in some fashion. It's tough sometimes to do that; to keep hope. We hope that insurance will approve our specialty meds. We hope that the next specialist will be able to answer all our questions. We hope that a new treatment will be approved for use. We hope that the new treatment plan will be the one to make us feel better. We hope that the migraine that's sent us home that day will be gone by the next morning. We hope that we can take a trip and be well enough to enjoy all the things we have planned. We hope that trip to the emergency care won't put us too far behind on our budgets. We hope and hope and hope.

I've given up the hope that someone will be able to explain why the migraines that have plagued me for the last two years exploded the way they did. I've given up hope that my neurologist will be available to me when I need her. I've given up hope that my current regimen of pills is doing anything to curtail the migraines. I've given up hope that Botox is the answer to my pain. I've given up trying to isolate a trigger that is within my power to control.

Yet, there at the bottom of the jar is the hope that this next phase will be the one. This time will make a difference. That one of the new CGRP meds is the solution for my migraines. It's going to take awhile to see if insurance will approve it. It's going to take awhile to get over the fear of giving myself a shot. It's going to take awhile for the med to build up in my system.

But I've been waiting for a few years now. I think I can wait a bit more. After all, what is there besides hope at this point? Hopefully, this time the solution is not a myth.