Back to Basics

As part of my new year plan I am reconnecting to my Wiccan beliefs.  That's right--I said Wiccan.  A few years ago I took a silly online quiz that matched your answers on a questionnaire to potential religions.  I wasn't practicing much of anything at the time.  Neo-pagan was high on the results, but it was not in first place.  There were a couple of Buddhist listings first.  However, as I began reading about the top 5 results on my list, I was drawn to paganism.  I love being outdoors.  I remember getting excited when the full moon came around and I would deliver my newspapers at the wee hours as the moonlight shone off the snow or the sun would just begin its climb in the sky.  I didn't know much about paganism other than my family's Catholic background was against it as a false god and that pagans were probably hippies who dance around in forests and beat drums.  The latter part is actually fairly accurate.  As I read The Complete Idiot's Guide to Paganism, I was drawn to Wicca and as many who are beginning in the craft, I quickly read everything I could get my hands on.
Lately, I feel as though I haven't been balanced.  I don't meditate as often.  I still get deep in thought and my husband teases me for it because of the tendency I have to mutter or move my lips like I'm talking to someone.  It's embarrassing.  Anyway, it's important to me to feel fulfilled, happy and honest in my life.  I struggle a lot with balancing life's journey and basically I'm a happy person, but I guess I want to make sure that my choices in life are based on my core values.  If I'm to do that, I really need to make sure that my core values are defined.  My spirituality is a big part of that.  I believe the way I do because of the basic rule of Wicca--harm none.  Now, do I need a religion to believe and live according to that?  Nah--but there's something comforting to ritual and to observing nature.  I feel more connected to the world and people around me when I am practicing.  Wicca makes me feel good.
Consequently, after about 10 years of reading and practicing, I am going back to the beginning to examine my beliefs and to live according to them.  I started rereading Scott Cunningham's Living Wicca.  I just finished part one and enjoyed seeing what I marked as important as a newbie and what strikes me as important now.  Cunningham includes a message at the start which says:  I've written this book as a guide not only to Wiccan practice, but to Wiccan life.  Still, its contents are merely ideas and suggestions.  Each of us has to find the perfect path.  May the Goddess and God assist you in this quest."  
May they indeed.  He suggests study, thought, prayer and experimentation.  So I shall study again with the bonus of hindsight and 10 years experimenting and thinking.  I think one area I can do more with is prayer.  It seems silly to my atheist buddies, but prayer is important.  I'd be surprised if even they didn't stop and ponder important big ideas which is all prayer is to me.  I am reaching out to the world around me asking for enlightenment or understanding; if addressing my seeking to the Lord and Lady helps me to uncover the answers I seek, great!  For some, that might not be necessary.  So be it.  I catch myself saying short little prayers more often.  To those who call religion superstition and a crutch, I say lucky you who has no need of the support.  I find Wicca magical, I find Wicca healing, and I find it to be the best fit for my core beliefs.  Harm none--so simple and yet so difficult in practice.  
I invite any and all to follow my journey.  This is a deeply personal and introspective journey, but I open to all as a way to help others who seek.  Be mindful and kind in comments though.  Avoid the temptation to be rude or cruel just because this is an anonymous medium.  
Blessed Be