The Goat and the Gemini

My goat is losing the battle.
My goat is what keeps me practical and balanced and focused while my gemini takes me on flights of fancy.  I don't care if you believe in astrology, because I don't particularly put stock in it as more than novelty either.  That said, I do recall finding out that my rising sign was Capricorn and suddenly certain aspects of my personality made more sense than being defined as just a gemini.  Poor ol' goat though is losing this fight.
I truly should just keep on keepin' on, but it's getting so difficult to gather up my inspiration and my courage and my creativity to keep moving forward.  My gemini feels completely devoid of life lately.  I still have my artistic pursuits mind you.  I still dance and love it.  I still play in polymer clay.  I still try to learn new drum moves.  However, my gemini feels like the way to earn our bread and butter sucks big fat hairy appendages. If I had been allowed to return to the way I wanted to proceed, it would be different.  Instead though, my ideas for getting back in touch with my master's program and the joy I experienced fizzled out in the face of duty.  That duty unfortunately seems to be misguided.  Inside I feel this overwhelming need to sob.  Maybe that's what I should do: cry, weep, or wail.  The grieving process has begun.  Maybe I should just accept it and move on.  Feel it.  Experience it.  Acknowledge it.  Then move on.
Please let those editors offer me something.